About 4 months ago, I wrote about de-cluttering as I had just finished a book on Minimalism that inspired me to do so. I received several messages from friends that it inspired them to do some de-cluttering of their own. I thought I would give an update on my progress in case anyone else needs some motivation for spring...er winter..cleaning.
I have just finished my 3rd book on minimalist living and am addicted to the thought of living with less. Whether or not I can actually get there is still unknown, but I'm on a good start. I have taken 12 car loads of stuff to Goodwill. You know the large white tubs you unload your stuff into at Goodwill....I have packed at least 12 of them! It feels SO GOOD to get rid of stuff!!! I get in moods where I just want to pitch anything in my way...and so far I haven't missed anything I've gotten rid of. It's very freeing!
Friends have asked me, "What are you getting rid of?" and "How do you have that much stuff to get rid of?" I have always been a sucker of the marketing world and loved to go shopping (I'm using the past tense as I hope to change this habit). Pretty, bright colored things always found their way into my shopping cart and hitched rides into my home....where I then had to find a place to put them and then maintain them. What I've learned through my readings and 12 trips to Goodwill in 4 months is that most of those things aren't worthy of taking up space in my house or my time that I have to clean them. I have gotten rid of things that I just recently bought and felt the stab of "why the heck did I waste money on this???" Most of the things I have bought aren't worthy of my money either. Darn marketers!!! I know they will never go away, but I can change the way I think about marketing. I'm already doing a lot better at just leaving the pretty things in the stores to be viewed there only. Knowing how much time and energy I have spent (thus time away from my kids) getting rid of things helps me say "no" to something I have my eye on.
When de-cluttering, it is recommended that instead of pulling things out that you want to get rid of, you should instead pull everything out and only put back in what you want to keep. I tried this method with my clothes and with my bathroom linen closet. It worked wonders!! Previously I would have maybe pulled out 5-6 shirts in my closet to get rid of, but using this method I got rid of 15. I first put back in the shirts that I knew I had worn in the last couple of weeks and then put back those that I wear occasionally and do like. Everything else....gonners. Now, everything in my closet is actually worn and it's so much easier to decide what to wear, because I truly love everything in my closet and know that it fits me and is comfortable. And before I went through my linen closet I wrote down the items that I thought were necessary to have in there, and then I only put those items back in. The rest of it got a hard interview to determine if it was worthy of being kept or not.
I finally got rid of all those items that I kept saying "I might use this someday" or "I might wear that someday". If I couldn't remember the last time an item was used, I got rid of it...no matter how much I liked it. If it isn't useful to me on a regular basis, it's not worthy of space in my house and my time to maintain it. I also thought hard about the realization of organizing. Too many times I have organized a space and felt so much better about it.....only to have to reorganize it again later. Organizing isn't de-cluttering and inevitably you will have to touch all of those items again at a later date for another round of organizing. If we instead just get rid of the items that don't truly need to be in that organized space, we won't have to touch them again later.
Why is living with less so interesting to me?? Minimalism is deeper than just de-cluttering.
It is understanding what is truly important to yourself and ridding your life of those things that distract you from that. I want to focus more on family time and less on dusting, cleaning, organizing, etc. I want my family to spend more time outdoors than in the living room. I want our home to be just a space where we eat, sleep, shower...the necessities. There are so many great things in this amazing world to experience and spending so much time in our house doesn't allow us the opportunity for learning about our world. Some lines that I highlighted in my readings regarding minimalist living are:
"the more stuff you own, the more your stuff owns you"
"living life is more enjoyable than managing and organizing stuff"
"there is more joy to be found in owning less than can ever be found in organizing more"
"minimalism is the intentional promotion of the things we value and the removal of everything that distracts us from it"
"minimalism values relationships, experiences, and soul-care and in doing so, it finds life"
"minimalism slows down life and frees us from this modern hysteria to live faster"
"our possessions rob us of precious minutes every day by being required to be cleaned, organized, maintained, fixed, removed"
Something I have been saying recently that I never thought would ever come out of my mouth is "my house is too big!". When we were creating our floor plan for our house 4 years ago, I wanted there to be a spot for all of our stuff. Anything that didn't have a "spot" in our old house, was going to get itself a spot in our new house. What I didn't realize at the time is how much I was giving our stuff priority. We all think we need a bigger house because all of our stuff is suffocating us...but what we really need is less stuff! The reality of a house is that it provides shelter, a true basic necessity. It's nice to be comfortable in our houses as we spend quite a bit of time in them...but no one really needs as big of a house as they think they do. All it does is require more of your time to maintain and allow you to acquire more things that you do not need. If I could, I would empty all of the contents of my house onto my yard, make a list of true necessities and items used regularly and bring only those things back into my house. If it was just me, I would honestly do this...but I have 3 other lives to consider too. Which brings me to my next thought....
Getting rid of unnecessary items and turning our attention to what's really important in life seemed like such a great thing to start now while our kids are so young and untouched by marketing and peer pressure. The book I just finished is about living with less with children. There are so many great points that the author highlights about teaching our children what's really important. He discusses some of the greatest gifts we can give our children, and none of them are bought in a store. One of my favorite things he says is, "Allow children of all ages to dream bigger dreams than cozy homes, cool cars and white picket fences."
I let Rylee help choose which of her items she wants to keep and which to get rid of. The interesting thing is that when I ask her to find some toys/books/etc to get rid of, she instead picks out the things she wants to keep -- which is exactly the way you are supposed to do it, according to my readings. What I like about this is that not only does she have all the control over what she keeps, she has the ability to pick out those items that are really important to her and see the rest as "no big deal" to get rid of. We are on the right track with her I think. She likes the idea of giving things to other kids (which is what I tell her we are going to do with her stuff she doesn't play with).
I've said it a million times and I'll say it again -- I'm SO READY for spring to get here so we can get outside and enjoy nature and all of the outdoor activities we haven't been able to do in months. My husband and I just recently agreed that TV is doing nothing good for us and we need to turn it off and spend more quality time together...all 4 of us. This will be a challenge, but one I'm definitely ready to take on (after this season of The Bachelor is over of course..and I will still watch Nashville..but the rest can go).
If you are interested in reading more about minimalism or just want some more motivation, the books I read and would recommend are:
Miss Minimalist: Inspiration to downsize, declutter and simplify.. by Francine Jay
Clutterfree with Kids: Change your thinking, Discover new habits .. by Joshua Becker
The Minimalist Women's Guide to Having It All .. by Meg Wolfe
The first two listed were the most in depth and inspiring to me. Read them and then spend the last few weeks of winter (I hope) getting rid of stuff that doesn't make you happy so you can enjoy life in the beautiful weather to come!
Have a great week!
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